To Girls Who Want to Date My Son,
I apologize that you have been left uneducated in the art of social skills. So, in order to save you from enormous amounts of embarrassment I have written up a list of common courtesies you might like to employ.
1. Never assume that you have an open invitation to our home.
2. Always treat my husband and me with respect.
3. Speaking in complete sentences is mandatory. If you can not speak in complete sentences, than most likely conversation is not what you are after, you can leave now.
4. If I see boob, thong, or excessive bare skin, I will point it out and make adjustments as necessary, therefore always be clothed in modest attire.
5. Windows are for fresh air and a glimpse of God's beautiful creation, not a doorway for you. I will kick you out if you fail to use the front door.
These are just the more obvious rules that most people have figured out but I have a few extras: Stalking our home is creepy, go away. Eye rolls make you look like an idiot. Lying to your parents makes me very angry, I will not stick up for you. Christianity is a lifestyle, not a cliche, bumper sticker or tattoo. Live it or leave it, but stop the act.
Sincerely,
The Mama
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